!!!

Ryan and I are celebrating our first Christmas this year. This is exciting and at the same time feels a little strange.

It's a bizarre awakening to adulthoood when you get married. It's hard to grow up and be responsible for yourself and your significant other. At times, it's difficult for me to understand that I'm not 10 years old anymore and that I have to start acting like an adult. And then I usually wonder what adults act like..

The other day, Ryan and I were talking with a friend/counselor we meet with once a month. We were discussing our feelings and frustrations about the church we are currently attending. I asked her if it was too idealistic to expect that we would ever find what we were looking for in a community of people. I really liked her response and felt sort of stupid for never realizing it myself. She basically told us (not in these exact words) that we're never going to find what we're looking for in a group of people aka. a church unless we find it in ourselves first.

DUH.

So, I guess thats apart of growing up. You create your own life in a way. And that all makes sense. You become the community you've always wanted to find.

I'll leave you with a photo of our first Chrstmas tree

I just can't seem to get in the habit of writing in these...


I will someday.

OMG it's almost October

I'm ready for pumpkin flavored everything.

I lose a lot of things

I haven't posted in this for a while. Because.... I forgot my password. I have the short-term memory of a small-brained animal.

Lately, I've been very thankful for the things I've been given/gifted. A couple mornings ago- I woke up with THE most overwhelming feeling of gratefulness I've ever had. Has this ever happened to you? I couldn't figure out if it was from a dream the night before or what....

I was grateful for these things:
-Ryan.
-My job for how lovely and real it is.. I have finally found a job that doesn't make me feel like a faceless person with no soul.
-My mom and dad. They are incredible people with good hearts and active lifestyles.
-The occasional good choice I make for my life.. bringing me closer to truth a.k.a. Jesus
-Harrisonburg.
-Bikes.
and many other things


FYI- This now Ashten's blog. Ryan decided to make his own. I'm not sure why... something about needing independence?

To Ashten (the only person that i know who reads this)

Hello my love:

About 20 minutes ago you left for work. You work a lot sometimes, and you are really talented at framing pictures. My guess is that if you stuck at it long enough, you would be world famous for your framing skills and people would bring you only the most important stuff to frame and you would have a waiting list of 2 years because everyone wants you and no one else. That is how good you are at framing. Sometimes I look at your art, framing, and decorating and I think....'Ashten is so very talented. I am glad I am married to such a talented person.' I suppose tonight I should tell you this in person as well.

When you left for work today you looked so pretty. I was hanging up the new mini blinds in our room so people cant look into our house and you walked in and said you were leaving. After we kissed and you were walking downstairs I was thinking about how pretty you are, and then I looked into the mirror and I was wearing these old Ohio State shorts with paint all over them and a white t-shirt that has cookie batter on it from last night. If we were walking on the street together, you being so pretty and me being so sloppy, people would think you were walking with a crazy homeless man and that you are so nice. But really, I would just be your husband. Thank you for loving me even when I look sloppy.

I am listening to Beck right now and it brings back a very specific memory with you. Max, you, and I were going up to Canton to shop before Max went to college and we were listening to The Beatles White Album disc 2 pulling out of your parents house. Then you put Odelay in. Now I have probably listened to this album at least one hundred times, but that is the only time I can specificly remember.

When you get home tonight you will find a clean apartment, good smelling lasagna, mini blinds in place, library materials returned, and the house in a comfortable environment. I do this because I am a neat freak for one....but also because I love you and I want you to be able to relax tonight when you get home. After we eat dinner and clean up, we can do whatever you want to do.

Remember when we got married twelve days ago. That was fun.

I love you a whole lot. I am excited for the rest of our lives.

Ryan Christopher Miller

Hey marriage

This past weekend Ryan and I got married. A couple weekends before that, I ran a half-marathon.

The wedding was incredibly fun. It was in the woods and it rained. The weather was a bonus for lighting in all of our pictures and everyone still showed up. That week I had been previously disturbed when someone told me "that people might not want to come if it's raining." Eventhough, I was pretty sure anyone we invited wouldn't not come because of a little rain. Who doesn't show up to weddings because it's raining.. WHO.. I want to know.

My half-marathon was funnn. I finished in around 2 1/2 hours. Which is way better than I thought I was going to do. My goal was 3 1/2 hours and only because that's when they stopped handing out the medals because.. whoever was left took too long and didn't deserve one I suppose..? Everyone was there to meet me at the finish-line. Later on, my friends told me they were nervous that when they saw me at the end I would be severely emotional and crying. I think because the older woman before me was severely emotional and... crying. I didn't cry, but i was so glad to be finished..

Grilled cheeze

I have eaten grilled cheese and tomato soup in large quatities over the past week.

So, the expensive tank of oil ran out in our apartment last week. Most of the time it feels like I'm living in a refridgerator. But hey, my carbon footprint is the size of a baby's at the moment. Oh wait, I use a space heater.. nevermind.

Last tuesday, I was riding my bike to work and to my surprise a railroad track jumped out in front of me and caught my front tire. While my bike stopped.. I kept going and hurled towards the ground at alarming speeds. I hit just about every part of my body and it was probably one of the most frightening things I've ever experienced. This happened on "main street" which as you can guess.. is a very busy road. I'm not sure how this happened- but right as I was thrown from my bike no cars happened to be wizzing right behind me. It was a miracle. And all I have to show for it are a few bruises and scrapes.

I need to be more careful.

-ashten